broken

i had been preparing myself for this eventuality for a long time, i had forsaken the pleasure of ruminating over guilt and past, in all ignorance succeeded in making myself believe that i am beyond hurts and i had blocked the very epicentre of pain. that reality no longer held the power to inflict its righteous threat on my eroded domain.

and yet it did, hit me, in my face like this cold, icy wind does. dramatic !!! nah!! well as expected i didnt get through the entrance to my post graduation. so here i am !!! gay, single and hopelessly lost ,creeper thriving on my parents!!! and have come to a stage in life where sex is no longer a need and hunger is all about food, fashion is about wearing anything and well friends!!! oh yes well , we could give broken heart's club a run for their money....

so to speak what options do i have. to live one full yr wid a bunch of breeders , salvagely thrashing each other's genitals with words and impregnating the bath room with our raging sperms like a drill, mandatory and traditional. or to live at home, well atleast i get to see gay porn though other chores wont differ much!!!

i did gain some perspective though...i mean uptill now my life was a fairly normal and average. weekly sex, good grades , parents were happy and well i was fairly contented...i gotta see the other side now.. and just about 6 months and world is upside down..so now i know what it feels to be growing old and yeah!!! (i hate to say so) being a loser...so much for perspective...i suck at gaining that too...

so i will sleep over my broken sense of invincibility...hopefully morning will be better and i wll carve out another cocoon and wait for another blow!!! until then cya

ps: if at all u read it...forgive me the typos...i am no mood for a spell check